Mason enters into a total meltdown when I ask him to clean the pile of books up from his bedroom floor. He cries and screams in his room for 10 minutes. It would take a total of 2 minutes to clean up, why does he have to make it more difficult on himself? I try my hardest to react without emotion when all I want to do is slap him and scream in his face ( I know, i know, I sound so harsh. Please tell me someone else feels this way!). After 15 minutes of crying he is finally cleaning up. I Fill the tub, wash Elizabeth, let her play.. Still waiting for mason to finish. After another 10 minutes I go to check on him. All of the books are away but now he has taken all of his pjs out of the drawer, all the socks out of their drawer, and all of his underwear are on the floor. He claims ( with heavy, tired eyes) that he needs to reorganize them because they were much too messy. I'm already spent from the day and it's making me even more tired to look at his exhausted face.
I give him a quick bath, brush his teeth and then ask him to put his pjs on as I put E to bed. When I come into his room he is attempting to re-roll his socks.
I could not be more tired and frustrated. I know that all he (and I) need is sleep. After prayers and a song, I kiss him and leave the room. As I'm gathering my things to head to my room, he comes out and asks me to come sleep w him because one, he is not tired at all and two, he doesn't want to sleep alone. I resist because I'm scared for this to continue night after night, but as I crawl in bed next to him and tell him that I love him he throws his arms around me, buries his head in mine, and within a minute his heavy, sleeping breath is in my ear. I layed there staring at his little face and reminding myself ( for the thousandth time) that he is just a sweet 5 year old boy who was having a bad day and needed his mommy to comfort him. Hell, I'm 29 and I still feel instantly comforted by my mommy. These kids are my world and yes, I do need a break every once in awhile, but Instead of Counting down the minutes until they are in bed, or planning my next night out, I need to realize how sweet and precious this time is.. Tantrums and all :)